Anders with some of his clinic harem

Songs for Anders Lindgren Clinics

 During the 10 years of clinics Anders has held at American Sporthorse, a loyal following of attendees developed. Some of their more creative efforts are preserved here for your enjoyment - I can assure you much of this is "you had to be there" humor, but seeing as there are so few dressage-based sing-alongs, we're sharing these with the internet world. Enjoy! Many of these were created by Debbie Ballinger.

 
To the tune of Frere Jacque
 

Train in walk please
With your boots squeeze
Supple him
Shoulder in
Of your weight be conscious
Turn upon the haunches
Round and Round
Round and Round
 

Proceed trotting
Bits are shuttleing
Stride by stride
Hollow side
Half-halts now will get him
If your hands permit him
Round and round
Round and round

Canter is fun
Do transitions
Rock and roll
Raise the poll
Half pass from the center
Pirouettes forever
Round and round
Round and round
 

Driving Fresians
Half halts then turn
Use your voice
Make some noise
Canter in a flurry
Sandy's getting worried
Round and round
Round and round

Train gymnastics
These are not tricks
Art comes first
It's a curse
To continue growing
We're forever going
Round and round
Round and round

(sounds great sung in a round of 2-3 groups)

 
To the tune of Jingle Bells
 

Dashing to and fro
The clinic's getting near
I must prepare to go
There's laundry up to here

My riding gloves are lost
The trailor needs a tire
If I take some more time off
I think I might get fired

Oh!
Pack your stuff
Fix your truck
Clean your boots and tack
A babysitter must be found
And give your horse a bath
Hey!
Gas the truck
Cook a lunch
Now load up with hay
To manage all the little things
You need an MBA

I plan when to arrive
What time do I ride?
Account for warm up time
The full moon and the tides

I think my planning's done
I only hope it's true
Now it's time to have some fun
The management is through...

No!!
Manage reins
Plan the change
Always think ahead
Conduct him with supple wrists
I think that's what he said Oh!
Manage scales
Balance fails
Schooling's never done
Soon I'll earn a PhD
For managing my buns

The Song that goes ON and ON and ON
(sung to the tune of "Alouette")
 

Anders Lingren
Teaches the dressage fan
Anders Lindgren
Shows us how it goes

He will shout "Now half pass right
That won't work the reins too tight'
 

Half pass right
Reins too tight
oh oh oh oh

He keeps coming
His wisdom he keeps drumming
We keep fumbling
He hopes we'll get it right

'Just this once please halt at B
Long your leg and watch your knee'

Halt at B
Watch your knee

Half pass right
Reins too tight
oh oh oh oh

Forward riding
Your horse should not be hiding -
Longer striding
If your legs work right

"If he balks then show the whip
Use your legs with open hip"
 

Show the whip
Open hip

Halt at B
Watch your knee

Half pass right
Reins too tight
oh oh oh oh

Nothing daunts him
Our failures do not haunt him
Humor lifts him
His patience though we try

"Release, relax, reward and rest
Pat him now and stretch the neck"
 

Reward and rest
Stretch the neck

Show the whip
Open hip

Halt at B
Watch your knee

Half pass right
Reins too tight
oh oh oh oh

Horses floating
Some of them are bolting
Anders gloating
He smiles at our distress.

"They will learn the piaffe here
Only when the longe whip's near"
 

Piaffe here
Longe whip's near

Reward and rest
Stretch the neck

Show the whip
Open hip

Halt at B
Watch your knee

Half pass right
Reins too tight
oh oh oh oh
 

Pirouettes done
Riders having great fun
Changes begun
We center till we drop

"He should do some tempis now
That was better, take a bow"
 

Tempis now
Take a bow

Piaffe here
Longe whip's near

Reward and rest
Stretch the neck

Show the whip
Open hip

Halt at B
Watch your knee

Half pass right
Reins too tight
oh oh oh oh

It's eight days now
Progress we made some how
Ate some great chow
Now it's time to go

Say the riders "Woe is near
For six months we shall not hear:

Tempis now
Take a bow

Piaffe here
Longe whip's near

Reward and rest
Stretch the neck

Show the whip
Open hip

Halt at B
Watch your knee

Half pass right
Reins too tight

oh oh oh oh
Anders Lingren's clinic in the rain

---

"Battle Hymn of the Lindgren Clinic"

(Sung to tune of "Battle Hymn of the Republic")
* denotes emphasis
 

1.
I *polished up my *boots, then clean'd and *oil'd each piece of *tack.
My *horse is in the *trailer, feed and *blankets are all *pack'd.
We're *on the road now, *off to Watson*ville and right on *track....
To Anders *Lindgren's *Clinic!

refrain: Glory, glory, hallelujah!
*We all *bring our problems *to ya'-
You teach us patiently, and somehow manage to succeed,
Your knowledge leads us on!

2. 
My *group is warming *up, but my horse *doesn't seem to *care.
He *won't pass F, he *shies at H, his *head is in the air.
I *work so hard and *struggle- Anders *makes me "hang in *there".
"They *can't be *perfect ev'ry *day!"

refrain: Glory, glory, hallelujah!
My *horse is *starting to come *through now;
He's *list'ning to my seat ... Hey! That feels really neat! (spoken)
"He's *starting to confess*!"

3.
 "Your *outside rein's the *side rein, and your *inside rein's the *longe,
Your *wrists are 'eating *grapefruit.' Are you *managing your *buns?"
Just *when we think we *can't take any *more, he yells "It's fun!"
And *we go *riding *on!

refrain: Glory, glory, hallelujah!
Horses are truly coming through now!
At last they're on the aids and now we've really got it made!
"And so let them eat sand!"

4. Our buns have felt the glory of the horse that's on the bit!
And now until we get that "feel," we just don't want to quit!
So is it skill, or is it art, or must we be more fit?
The truth we still pursue!

refrain- Glory, glory, hallelujah!
Anders, we've got to hand it to ya'.
You *take each move a*part and teach dres*sage as classic *art!
Your truth goes riding on!

repeat: Glory, glory, hallelujah!
Glory, glory, hallelujah!
Results are very fine. We all thank you for your time...

AND HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!
by Pat and Joe -- March 6, 1994

 
An Anthology - This is your Clinic Anders

for Maj. Anders Lindgren
(with help from his loyal clinikers, and special thanks Debbie Ballengerrrrrrrrrr)

[Read at a dinner to celebrate Ander's Birthday -- round-robin affair with Anders
guessing who is to read next from each clue given]
 

Clue #1 When Anders calls out "focal Point" this rider checks out local points.

(Nancy, who is legally blind)
I come to the Watsonville Best Western
And into #136 settle
Then across to hug Barbara and get my first meal
The cowboys all oggle at my mettle.

Clue #2
**We must assume she likes the color brown in horses. She went from mini to maxi
without changing colors.

(Vicki, with a string of "Anders-isms")
I teach riders dressage, sometimes they're thick as brick
I drill them with my sayings to make the lessons stick
Buns management around the cones,
Ride with open hips,
Squeezing sponges,
Conduct Bernstein with your supple wrists.
Create something beautiful,
Elevate the poll,
Shuttle bits, squeezing boots,
Enjoy him, rock n' roll
Somtimes now I wonder, when the long days done
If not for those great sayings, would riding be as fun?

Clue #3
**She rides the redhead with the big buck.

(Sue)

Sometimes it is wonderful to be in California,
Under the blue skies, baked by the sun,
Thinking of the snow at home, glad to be abroad,
This is hardly work at all - this is mostly fun!

Then next clinic the weather changes,
Rain, and wind, and freezing cold.
I stand all day, too wet to sit!
I think that this will make me old!

Clue #4
**She gave up John doing changes. Now she's "Piloting" changes again.

(Paula)
There's more to this than riding,
We strive to be complete.
If you like cross training
The clinics quite a treat!

We exercise our voices
we have it all on tape
As long as you are tone-deaf
The singing sounds just great.

We exercise our minds as well,
Ander's voice kept us on track.
The best we rode to our suprise
Was completely on our backs!

Clue #5
Of this lady's horse, Anders says "He is so laaaay-zeeeee" (Sandy)
 

If you're still not satisfied
There's other things to do
Like kibitzing and cooking,
Massage and ring crew too.

To help maintain your fitness
Jogging is required
We chase loose horses around the field
While they're running wild

Sometimes you can combine two sports
To train more easily
Like riding down along the beach
And Swimming in the sea.

There's driving and long-reining
We're getting in too deep.
For when we finally got back home
We only want to sleep.

Clue #6
**She traveled to the Lingren home and drank the night away. (Maureen)

Oh we travel, we two
nearly half the year through
It's so difficult then to eat right
For we wine and dine
The food is so fine
We try to resist, how we fight!

There's dinner and lunch
And there's Fritos to munch
And the great barbecues, Heaven knows
Let the diet start tomorrow
For today I'll drown my sorrow
In a truffle from India Joze.

Clue #7
**This rider is the clinics poet laureate. (Debbie)

Its all men in the cavalry you see
But the clinic's completely male-free
They call out when we dine
"Brigham, party of nine!"
It's a whole flock of women and me.

All men is sometimes a curse
All women just might be worse!
They look snobby as hell
But they don't steer too well
When across the ring they traverse

Clue #8
**When her horse leaves, Anders calls out "Send me a post card". (Andrea)
(whose big horse once told Anders where and when to get off)

The people I try hard to teach
The horses, they try hard to learn
Submission and harmony are yours
When their respect you have earned.

When you ride for the horses' good cheer
Its important that your aids be clear
When you pull to the left and you lean to the right
Your horse thinks "you're not intelli-gent dear."

For my part, respect has come easy
Fitzwilliam has shown me the light
I tried for a touch of submission
That Irishman put me in flight!

They leap and they rear and they bolt
They buck and they snort with great glee
They run from the whip and cavort
They exhibit such great energy.

Clue:
**When you need tea and plenty of it, this lady has the biggest mug in town
 

(Cynthia)
Great talent is shown by some
Some have more to show yet.
While for some I have fond memories
There are some that I wish I'd not met.

But in all modesty, its been a great life
And as I look back in reflection,
Will I still teach at ninety-five?
Why not? It's great to be aged to perfection

Anders, you're a 10!

 
The Spontaneous Quadrille!

There were four girls in hot pink
With horses as dark as black ink
They all looked the same
Would he remember their names?
NO - but it would make him think!

To gain time he began a quadrille
It gave the spectators a thrill
The precision was fine
Traveling all in a line
It was amazing that no one was killed!

This drill team was destined for fame
"We are the best" they could claim
Circles and swirls
By four hot pink girls
At last Anders remembered their names!

 
An Ode to ANDERS By Debbie Ballinger

Hello Pucci, Hello Anders,
Here we are at Ursula Travers,
We are riding and we're sweating,
And We KNOW it good instruction that we're getting!

Since precision is required,
We ride through cones until we're tired,
If your steering, it is blighted,
And you step upon the cones he gets excited.

Come from M now, no, that's not X
With 4 horses, its a BIG mess,'
Follow Laura, on the double,
If you don't know left from right - you're in real trouble!

If the riding doesn't kill ya,
Stick around, there's more to thrill ya,
Sandy Howard, known as drill sarge,
Taught a course in exercise that was too hard.

Stretch this muscle, strengthen that one,
Get a burn out, (isn't this fun!)
Just like boot camp, can't you see us,
I wish I were home sipping margaritas!

Take me home, oh Mudder, Fadder,
Take me home, its like a slaughter,
If I resist or give him any lip, he might chase me with a WHIP!
Take me home,
I Promise that I won't complain
about my half-pass are a-gain
Oh please don't nake me stayl I've been here one whole day!l

Ken Ravizza was surprising
with his psycho-analyzing
From your hang-ups he will free ya
Spend an evening discussing diarrhea!

Take me home
The things I'm good it I have blown
Each weakness that I have - I've shown
The battle I have fought, I lost, my horse is still the Boss.
Take me home,
The chairs are hard, the sun is hot,
They're all'so good, my stomach's a knot,
Oh please don't make me stay they've got the video today!

Wait a minute! There's a half-halt,
and another, and-a GOOD volte,
some clean changes, Gee, that's better,
Mudder Fadder kindly disregard this letter.

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